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Greetings, Chieficionados!
In what we realize has rapidly become a painfully tired old line, boy, has it been a long time since the last edition of The Chief (tm) News
hit the newsstands! Of course, the nation-wide celebrations of The Chief
(tm)'s Half-Birthday on Nov. 18 -- featuring the usual parades,
sky-writing, organ grinders & cymbal-playing monkeys, etc. --
helped tremendously to occupy the tedium perma-docked in the reading
audiences' "lives".
(Oh, and perhaps Thanksgiving did, as well.)
But with TC(tm)N
withdrawal symptoms no doubt approaching near-psychosis levels, good
news is we're back and giving you the real thing! And in this case,
said "real thing" includes The Chief (tm)'s first-ever exposure to cold
temperatures and snowfall whilst behind the wheel of the big boy.
Assignment:
haul a trailer's worth of non-expedited parcels for a major worldwide
shipping company whose name shall go unmentioned (but whose HQ is in
Memphis, TN). "Actual", the load was only about 15K lbs., roughly a
third of a trailer's capacity. Pre-loaded, so no waiting around; jes'
hook up an' git...that is, after locating our trailer from among literally hundreds parked at the distribution center.
Incredible. We headed out of Riverside County past Vegas and into the
southwest corner of Utah, where pre-sunrise temps first hovered right
around the freezing mark, but then slowly dipped into the mid-20's even
as El Sol, the Giver of Life, made its appearance and illuminated the
rock formations along the west side of Interstate 15. The red color from the moisture-laden rock contrasted beautifully with the blue sky behind it.
We
turned off I-15 onto I-70, aiming east along the route that heads
towards Grand Junction, CO and then afterwards, through canyons and
mountains past Glenwood Springs...where, you'll all be thrilled to
learn, the construction of the new bridge over the river, which was
underway when The Chief (tm) passed through in August (?), has now been
completed. Interstate 70 itself has been mentioned previously on these
pages, but not when streams and creeks and even waterfalls had
developed layers of ice upon them! Also, this was the first time that
we had driven eastward on the
road, mostly on the lower "shelf" that the EB lanes are built upon.
(The design of the road is worth reading up about, seriously.) A
freight train came down the tracks on the other side of the canyon, and
then a dusting of snow began to fall. The road is narrow and twisty,
and that's why the speed limit for trucks is only 45 MPH...and
sometimes even *that* pace is challenging to safely maintain.
Night
began to fall as we came out of the canyon near Gypsum, and in the
increasing darkness the holiday lighting and decorations in Eagle, Vail
and Silverthorne shone brightly. But the snow began to fall, too, and
soon enough there was about 2" on the unplowed roads. Sure, big plows
were standing by and eventually got going, but not before we climbed up
to the 10,600-ft. mark at the rest stop at Vail Pass. Here, unplowed
snow was on the order of 6" and the temperature -- are you ready? --
was at 9 DEGREES FAHRENHEIT. Br-r-r-r-r! But there was no wind
whatsoever and it wasn't at all obvious how cold the thermometer read...although we know that pretty much everyone in the TC(tm)N universe can remember reports of summertime temperatures, in AZ and NV and so on, reaching over 100 degrees *higher*! Sacre bleu!
On the
way back down from the peak, we saw the big electronic signs telling us
that commercial vehicles were legally required to put on tire chains up
ahead -- "throwing iron", as the grizzled, frostbitten veterans call
it. Colorado doesn't play around WRT wintertime driving regulations:
commercial vehicles MUST carry chains from Sept. 1 (!) until May 31 (!)
in order to travel on I-70, and sometimes you do actually need 'em right at those times!
Now, our younger
readers -- the "next-gen" Chieficionados, you were undoubtedly already
thinking -- likely do not recall a time when tire chains were fairly
common sights even on passenger vehicles. Although those times are long
gone, if you check on YouTube for video of the chain-up process, you
can see how much of a pain in the ass it really is. Right off the bat,
for heavy-duty trucks riding on tires some three feet in diameter, the chains themselves weigh about fifty pounds...
...EACH!
And you're putting on a minimum of four and a maximum of ten sets of the gol-darned things! Luckily,
we had not chains but another type of ATD ("Approved Traction Device"),
which are instead cables. MUCH lighter, and therefore much easier to
arrange before securing to the tire.
Putting them on still
requires strict adherence to a process, or else you won't have them all
properly ready to be tightened at the same time, and you'll have to
back up or move forward again to fix the rogue ones. But we nailed it
on the first try and got 'em all secured up in what the clock says took
thirty minutes, but which seemed rather quicker than that.
Once they're on, you are limited to a top speed of 30 MPH...
...and then, after all that, twenty miles later there's a sign telling you to take them off! Which,
of course, takes less time, but now you've got all these filthy, wet
chains that you have to throw back into the storage area in the truck.
When it's all over, you've needed about ninety minutes to travel those
twenty miles. I guess that's why they call it "work"?
But hey, at least the office has a view! And it always changes!
Fast forwarding just
a touch: whatever night it was, playing on the sound system at a truck
stop, Wheeling, WV, 2:29 AM -- "Christmas Wrapping" by The Waitresses.
An all-time '80's classic...
All for now, gang,
all for now!
-- Sincerely,
The Chief (tm)
a.k.a.
The Pacific Standard (tm)
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